Dating With A Biblical Perspective

In this section, I would like to begin by asking the question, "Why should one date?" This may seem like a simple question, but many people never even stop to consider it seriously. Recently this question was posed: "What is the purpose of having a boyfriend/girlfriend?"

One eleven year old girl responded, "Because when you are feelin’ down they make you feel a lot better!" Sadly, this reflects the view that the majority holds. For many people, "Because it makes me feel good" is enough of a reason to do almost anything. Dating is seen by most as a good way to have fun, find acceptance and pleasure - regardless of the long-term consequences.

The Christian, however, should have a different viewpoint and should take time to evaluate exactly why he or she is interested in dating. We must remember that we are to do all in the name of (or by the authority of) the Lord . . . (Col. 3:17) Ask yourself, "Am I interested just because I want the pleasure of being in a relationship, or am I ready for a commitment to marriage?"

Entering into a relationship when you aren’t ready for marriage is like starting a race knowing that you have no intention of finishing it! "Recreational dating" completely disregards Matt. 7:12 "All things therefore whatsoever ye would that men should do unto you, even so do ye also unto them..." If we are honest, we will admit that we wouldn’t want someone to become emotionally involved with us when they aren’t really serious, and then "dump" us when they are ready to move on. Thus, we should not do so to others.

Philippians 2:3-5 instructs us to do "nothing through faction or through vainglory, but in lowliness of mind each counting other better than himself; not looking each of you to his own things, but each of you also to the things of others. Have this mind in you which was also in Christ Jesus..." In every aspect of our lives we should look to the good of others before ourselves, as Christ did.

When putting others' best interest before our own, we will stop to consider whether the things we do will help or hinder another person - whether entering into a relationship with someone would be the best thing for that person at the time. Additionally, one should evaluate whether or not he or she is personally ready for a marital commitment, and keep in mind that if we are not simply dating for fun, the only other valid reason would be to find a mate.

Scripture taken from the American Standard Version, 1901

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heart with a rose