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Be Kind to Your Husband

By Amy Brown  

Love suffers long and is kind; (I Cor 13:4a)

Think about the people you interact with on a daily basis. Whether it is at church, in the neighborhood or elsewhere in the community, you probably make an effort to be kind to the different people you encounter. We often put our "best foot forward" in these situations, but what about the people we are closest to? More specifically, what about the man with whom we entered into the marriage covenant?  You most likely see him every day but may not be nearly as sweet and kind to him as you are to the mailman! I know I have fallen into this trap before and taken out frustrations born of an entirely different situation on the very man I vowed to love, honor and obey.

What does it mean to be kind? One source defines the word as having, showing or proceeding from benevolence; helpful, humane, considerate, mild, gentle. Galatians 5:22 lists kindness as one of the fruits of the Spirit; and in the book of Proverbs, much is said of the "worthy woman" and some of the ways she shows kindness to her husband.

She does him good and not evil all the days of her life. Prov 31:12

She opens her mouth with wisdom, and on her tongue is the law of kindness. Prov 31:26

She watches over the ways of her household, and does not eat the bread of idleness. Prov 31:27

As Christians, we know we are to be kind to ALL men:

Therefore, as the elect of God, holy and beloved, put on tender mercies, kindness, humility, meekness, longsuffering; Col 3:12

Ladies, this includes your husbands! Not only does it include them when they are present, it also applies when they are away from your presence. I have been so disappointed in times past at the things I have heard Christian women say about their husbands. Criticism and bitterness laced their remarks, and often their husbands were made the butt of jokes. This kind of conversation has no place among us, and we should continually be seeking to build up and encourage our husbands. I am sure if you asked these women, most of them would say that they loved their husbands. However, we know from scripture what true love really is, don't we?

Love suffers long and is kind; love does not envy; love does not parade itself, is not puffed up; does not behave rudely, does not seek its own, is not provoked, thinks no evil; 1 Cor 13:4-5

Kindness is the second characteristic listed, and one could make a case that the rest of the characteristics are part of being kind. We should strive to be an example in ALL we do so that others may say of us:

The heart of her husband safely trusts her; so he will have no lack of gain. Prov 31:11

1. Read I Corinthians 13 and tell how each characteristic of love might relate to exhibiting kindness.

2. Cite an example in scripture of a wife dealing kindly with her husband.

3. Do a word study on kindness. Tell what you find.

4. How many times does the word "kindness" appear in the Bible as a characteristic of what we are to be?

5. And be ________ to ______ ______________, __________________________, forgiving one another, even as God in Christ forgave you. Eph 4:32 NKJV

6. But also for this very reason, giving all __________________, add to your __________ virtue, to virtue knowledge, to knowledge self-control, to self-control perseverance, to perseverance godliness, to godliness ____________ ___________, and to ___________ ____________love. For if these things are yours and abound, you will be neither barren nor unfruitful in the knowledge of our Lord Jesus Christ. 2 Peter 1:5-8 NKJV

7. What are some ways we can become kinder women?

8. Would there ever be any situation or circumstance where kindness would not be warranted?

9. Give an example of the Lord's kindness to us.

10. List a few ways in which you might show kindness to your husband. These can be things you have already put into practice or something new that you know he would appreciate.